There once was a knight back in Stout-upon-Lark
A long time ago, when the Ages were Dark,
Who hammered down dragons for a kiss or a rose ––
Today it’s so rare you see one of those.
O, the brave knight of Stout-upon-Lark!
But at night, in his bed, he quite lost his spark…
He would shiver and shudder and cower and wail:
In the dark he saw terrors and ghosts oh so pale.
And every night, as the nervousness hit,
He tried cheerful rhymes to recover his wit.
And every time, he would start in this way:
Now what did I do that’s heroic today?
Slain seven dragons,
And saved a fair maid!
Then why am I now
so scared and afraid?
As daybreak returned and the bright sun did rise,
He was back killing dragons, as if they were flies.
Ah, the brave knight of Stout-upon-Lark!
But that night, in his bed, it was awfully dark!
So he got back to rhyming without a delay:
What did I do that was pleasant today?
Greased up my harness
And saddled my steed
Complimented my wife
On her last batch of mead
So why am I trembling
Like a wind-shaken reed?
When the moon disappeared, so the dark made you blind,
The great dragon-slayer began losing his mind
He would softly start crying at the tiniest sound
And quietly murmured, as he felt his heart pound:
Vanquished a maiden
And rescued a snark
Am I saying this right?
Oh, why is it so dark?!
Saddled my wife
And greased up my steed
Thanked my dear dragon when she gave me my mead…
I just heard a noise, and I’m weak at the knees
I’m afraid in the dark
Someone rescue me, please!
MAMAAAAAA!!!
— Annie M.G. Schmidt